White supremacist lame duck pardons a fluffy turkey at the White House

This year’s White House Turkey (the other alt-right meat) was really pretty, right? His name was Corn, and I guess Cob also got pardoned, but Corn was the one who posed prettily for the cameras at yesterday’s White House Turkey pardon. I’m trying to figure it out…this was Donald Trump’s fourth public appearance since losing the election. Melania was there too, smiling her Botox off in what seemed like genuine happiness. Less than two months to go before she files for divorce! (I actually don’t think she’ll file for divorce.)

The annual turkey pardon is supposed to be a fun, light-hearted event for presidents to show off their photogenic families, and for the White House speechwriters to show off their dad-joke-writing skills. But during the Trump era, everything always feels fraught and awful constantly, and none of these people have a sense of humor. So instead of making a few dad jokes or lame-duck jokes, Trump talked about the stock market. At the White House turkey pardon!! Jesus.

— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) November 24, 2020

I mean… the DOW climbed so high because Trump did his half-assed concession and the market is looking forward to the stability of the Biden administration. Plus, the DOW is not the best indicator of where the economy is. Most of the indicators point to the fact that we’re actually heading towards a recession.

Anyway, Trump also built in some praise for himself, giving himself a pat on the back for the vaccines and the economy and other sh-t. This was the closest he came to a joke: “Thanksgiving is a very special day for turkeys. Not a very good one, when you think about it.” He also had to check his speech to recite his grandchildren’s names – Ivanka and Jared brought their kids to the turkey pardon, and the Family Javanka all wore masks. So did everyone else besides Bigly and Melania. Weird, huh.

I mean, we all know what’s coming too. He’s going to try to pardon all of his mob associates in this administration. We’ll see.

Photos courtesy of Backgrid.

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