I think my fella is cheating with a man and using me to pretend to be straight

DEAR DEIDRE:  I WORRY my partner is cheating on me with another man.

I’m a woman of 47 and he’s 50.

I’ve never been good at choosing partners. The last one was violent.

I thought this guy was lovely until I saw he’d been looking at gay dating sites. I confronted him but he laughed it off.

So I snooped on his phone and saw messages to men saying what he’d like to do to them. I was shocked.

Recently he’s been out for hours at a time in the dark when he claims he’s walking the dog. It’s obvious he’s meeting someone.

I also discovered he’d googled an STI clinic.

I traced his phone when he was late home one night and he was there, at this clinic.

I worry I’m just a front so he can pretend to be straight.

Get in touch with Deidre today

My team and I are working safely from home but we are here to help you as always.

Send an email to [email protected]

Every problem gets a personal reply, usually within 24 hours weekdays.

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DEIDRE SAYS: Maybe he struggles to be open about his sexuality but you can’t go on like this.

Insist on a serious conversation and tell him what you know.

The signs are he is cheating on you. Get a sexual-health check and point out to him the risks of Covid.

Counselling will help you both deal with this.

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