I want another baby but my partner's had a vasectomy

DEAR DEIDRE: I AM desperate to have a baby but my partner had a vasectomy two years ago.

He is adamant he doesn’t want any more children.


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We’ve been together for five years. I’m 32 and he’s 47. I have a son from a previous relationship and my partner has two kids with his ex.

I didn’t support his decision to have a vasectomy three years ago but he went ahead with it.

I approached the subject of having a baby last week and he said that while he liked the idea, his age and how his children would feel is holding him back.

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He is on the fence about getting a vasectomy reversal and trying for a baby.

I love him but I long for a baby so much. It’s like a neverending ache.

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DEIDRE SAYS: One of you will need to compromise in order to overcome this.

And a compromise here means letting go of a closely held desire for the sake of the other.

You will both need to keep talking, explaining what this would mean to you and listening to your partner about what it would mean for him.

You wouldn’t want to force him to have a child – that would only end in resentment.

The Fertility Network (fertilitynetworkuk.org, 01424 732 361) can offer support.

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