My bully boyfriend controls what time I go to bed

DEAR DEIDRE: MY boyfriend told me to “close down” the house at 10pm because he needs to sleep.

I’m 49 and nobody has told me to go to bed at a particular time for 35 years!

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He’s 54, and we’ve been living together for six months, after dating for two years.

He can be lovely, but he also has a temper, talks over me in an argument and can never see my point of view.

He turns everything around, so it seems like I’m in the wrong.

The truth is, he’s a bit of a bully. I could cope with it until he told me that once he goes to bed the house must be dark and silent.

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I’m not allowed to watch TV, go on my phone or even read a book.

Should I leave him?

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DEIDRE SAYS:  This is classic controlling behaviour.

He sounds abusive and I’m afraid it’s likely things will only get worse.

My support pack, Abusive Partner, will give you the tools you need to get help and to leave him.

Call the National Domestic Abuse Helpline (, 0808 2000 247).

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